Forgiveness: The key to an empowered life

“You see things as they are and ask, ‘Why?’ I dream things as they never were and ask, ‘Why not?’”   — George Bernard Shaw

“You see things as they are and ask, ‘Why?’ I dream things as they never were and ask, ‘Why not?’” — George Bernard Shaw

by Tammy Holmes — 

A Course in Miracles defines the term “forgive” as meaning “to let go.” Forgiveness enables one to move forward and live an empowered life. To forgive is equal to claiming freedom — the freedom to be who we are and to live the life we were meant to live. To forgive is to ask why not — to see what might be rather than holding on to a past that no longer serves us.

The first step in the act of forgiveness is one of ownership. Owning our personal need to forgive — whether it is forgiving ourselves or forgiving another. This step usually is not a singular event, but rather a process. We practice embracing love instead of fear. Then we practice some more. Over time, we find ourselves responding differently to the world. In response, the world around us transforms — and it seems as if we are born anew.

We can use various tools to begin practicing forgiveness. This process often is referred to as “cleaning house.” We need to clean our inner house through the act of forgiveness before we can prepare to “redecorate” our life. Imagine the chaos if we went out and bought new furniture before removing the old? The new items simply would not fit, and life would not be significantly changed.

Here are a few great tools to begin the process of forgiveness.

  • Gratitude — Each day, list five things for which you are grateful.
  • Blessings — Actively bless those you are finding it difficult to forgive. This doesn’t need to be a complex process — even simply stating or writing 10 times, “(name of person), I bless/forgive you and release you to the highest good,” is an extremely powerful exercise.
  • Affirmations — These help us utilize the power of our subconscious mind. We don’t come out of the womb with negative self-talk; it is learned behavior. With practice, it can be unlearned.

We have heard of some of these techniques before, but are we applying them? When used, they can be extremely powerful and can open the doorway to a new world — if we allow them to. The healing comes in the process, in the practice. In other words, we must use these techniques regularly in order for them to take effect.

With a little practice, we can surrender, let go and move forward to an empowered life.


Tammy Holmes is a renowned medium and life coach., 602-347-7799 or

Reprinted from AzNetNews, Volume 25, Number 1, February/March 2006.


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