To grieve is to heal

To grieve is to heal

Grieving is difficult and can be a very intimidating leap. We can either choose to grow or remain the same.

by David Berger — 

Grieving is a natural step toward growth and healing. But our grief isn’t limited to the times when life is difficult or when we lose someone who means a lot to us. Artists grieve. Whether they sing, dance, sculpt, paint or create in any sense, they grieve upon completion of a work. This explains why many artists go through depression after a work is complete, and why others leave so many pieces unfinished.

As people, we are all unfinished pieces. We grieve because we have broken out of familiar territory, are standing on unfamiliar ground and are frightened. We are all artists creating ourselves over and over again. We need to grieve to release the old, stagnant emotions so we can make room for brighter new ones.

Grieving is difficult and can be a very intimidating leap. We can either choose to grow or remain the same. If we stay the same, we become static and our spirits go dormant. Staying the same is not necessarily easier — it is, however, very familiar.

As we continue to grow, we will continue to shed old ways. Take a chance to be different; choose to change. Become again that child who wanted to draw on the wall with crayons. Adults once told us we couldn’t do that; but now, we are instructing our child inside to draw on the walls so we can create a new self.

Many of us cry when we grieve. View crying in a symbolic way, as a washing away of the old. Tears are water; water flows and cleanses and also helps things grow. When we cry, whether internally or externally, we release the logjam of emotions, allowing new energies and thoughts to flow, and our inner selves to show.

Many times the tears are hot, but these hot tears of emotion can help burn away many hurts and frustrations. After we release, we feel our bodies relax because we have released the toxins that had frozen the body. Crying is a wonderful way of being present, and in being present, we heal.

It is not necessary, when releasing old emotions, to relive the old traumas, but it is essential to experience the feelings and let them go. Thank the old hurts you have released because they got you to the point where you said, “Enough is enough,” and you decided to heal.

After the release, be in the moment, remembering the moment and noticing how good you feel. Carry this good feeling with you as long as you can so it can inspire you to release all the old hurts.

Remember, everyone and everything is perfect; our perceptions and our perspectives are the only things that distort the perfection.

David Berger is a licensed massage therapist who works with individuals as an emotional intuitive, assisting the release of cellular memory from the body through acupressure. He is also certified in equine massage. Both human and horse clientele benefit from his expertise in neuromuscular therapy and myofascial bodywork. 480-513-7631.

Reprinted from AzNetNews, Volume 24, Number 2, April/May 2005.